April 2013
kushdrinker:
romeo thought juliette deleted her blog so he deleted his and she was so sad she deleted for real
March 2013
saltandvinegarcrisps:
if you every feel stupid just remember that a girl from my school tried to give herself gauges with a hole puncher
someone: what are your plans for the weekend
me: who knows
me: (i know)
me: (i'm not leaving the house)
newpope:
esexist:
i really need a job
[alicia keys voice] THIS GIRL IS FOR HIIIIREEEEEEEEE
nohomocide:
accent marks and italics can make any word look beautiful
bonèr
do you ever just wanna kiss your boyfriend but realize you don’t have one
zanelowe:
maddiesaur:
the-bite-of-frost:
gothamshitty:
kushdrinker:
sweet dreams are made of cheese
who am i to diss a brie
i travel the world for the cheddar cheese
everybody’s lookin’ for feta
is that you dom
tardisity:
everybody you have ever met came out of a vagina screaming in fear
sadboyparty:
I kiss down your body. You let out a moan. I continue down, my tongue running to your clit. You arch your back as I keep going, my lips pressed against your inner thigh. Lower and lower I go, until I hit your ankles. You look down, confused, as I kiss my way off your body and onto the ground. Kissing my way right out the door of your bedroom and into your fridge. I eat all your food...
rrueplumet:
you see i like the idea of a tattoo but in reality i can’t even decide where to put stickers without regretting it once i’ve stuck it down never mind if it was part of my actual person
princass:
life is tough when you’re a lazy perfectionist who simultaneously doesn’t give a shit about anything but at the same time cares too much about everything u feel
rosiebeck:
nxv:
primisthebomb:
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR TO CATCH IT IN MY MOUTH BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND HIT THE CEILING AND THERE WAS A SPIDER THERE AND THE SPIDER FELL AND SO DID THE GRAPE AND THEY BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE AND I STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING
i read the first line in my head in the tune of call me maybe im so stupid
I threw a grape in the air I went to catch it I...
dampsandwich:
realsuperdry:
dampsandwich:
SCRATCHING YOUR FACE WITH THE WRONG SIDE OF A PEN
judging by your url your life is a huge mess
judging by yours, you’re a middle-aged woman going through menopause
thehemospectrum:
thepedospectrum:
thehemospectrum:
louisharrystylinson:
thehemospectrum:
what if our fingers were only as long as our toes
I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS
i think this is getting a little
out of hand
i love you
Expectations: Using the person next to you as a pillow.
Reality: Using the pillow next to you as a person.
bludgertothehead:
you’re lying if you say you’ve never recorded yourself singing because you were sure you had talent and were so deeply disappointed that you just deleted the recording and pretended it never happened
good-angel-bad-wolf:
alyssaannfrank:
lovelynobody00:
I wish i actually wore the fashion taste i have
I wish I could afford the fashion taste I have
I wish I could fit into the fashion taste I have
tellerknowles:
does anybody else have that friend that you’re pretty sure is your soulmate but in a friend way
50shadesocray:
christianmingle:
what if the internet doesnt actually exist and youre just mentally insane and staring at a box pretending there is light coming out of it and youre talking to people
stop
shakespeareintellectualbadass:
examples that prove being a fangirl works
Ginny Weasley
Kate Middleton
Peeta Mellark
Evanna Lynch
Amy Pond
you forgot David Tennant
la-meilleure-amie:
Everyone SAYS they want a fairytale wedding but when I show up and curse their firstborn suddenly I’m a jerk.
